I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize