i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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