Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
