3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
okay pat passed out under dana's car
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Randomize
