Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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