no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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