To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Randomize
