Sponge bath it is.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
