Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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