Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
