you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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