My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
