yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
