she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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