So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
