I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
