So drunk its hurt
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
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