Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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