Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize