Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
So much rum. So many feels.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
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