I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
