Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
