Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
We're too hungover to prance.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
