There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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