Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize