:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
