i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
