doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
