Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
