am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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