I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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