East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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