remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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