giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
