Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
