Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
