Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
