I wannas sexs uuuuu
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
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