Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
