but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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