she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
