I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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