Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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