I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
