I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
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