I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize