Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
You may now shotgun with the bride
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Randomize