I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
