one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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