I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
